Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Apparently....

IVF #2 has worked for us. Yep. Last time I started testing 6dp3dt and tested every day until I got my positive 10dp3dt (and even then, for days afterward). I think I have like 10 saved + tests from that time. The beta is always 12dp3dt and 14dp3dt.

This time? I figured it'd be a good decision to wait until 9dp3dt. So a day before I got the + last time, so that if I got a - I'd not be surprised, and it could prepare me for the -'s that might follow in the next few days. Sort-of ease into it. I definitely didn't want to test on Mother's Day anyway, because I just wanted to concentrate on my mom, and being grateful for her life, her love for us kids, and having her around. Mother's Day wasn't tough, we called both our moms and talked an hour each. Mom mom adored the card and present I got her. I had urges that evening to just POAS, but figured why ruin the day?

Monday morning (9dp3dt) came and as J hopped in the shower I POAS. But I stuck it under the sink. After my 20 minute shower, once he was out of the bathroom, I looked at it.... And what should I see when I'm 90% knowing it'll be stark white? A second line. Pretty dark, as in it's porbably been visible for a few days dark (way darker than my 1st last time). So of course I went to show J (now he knows how to read those things). It was strangely anti-climactic.

Yes, we're beyond happy that IVF has once again gotten me pregnant. Who would have thought? I know that's so lucky and I don't even know how to relate to it not working. I know I have much to be thankful for. And I am. We are. Yet, since we've been here before ,we are I guess a bit scared. We're happy, but we know that happiness can be taken away in one horrible night. So I guess it's reserved happiness? I'm sorry it has to be this way, but I do want to be grateful for every day these embryos keep growing in my body. They were both better cell-growth than the two we put back last time. So I'll wait to see what my betas are, and pray these little ones stick around so I can see them on the ultrasound, and then the next 8 months. I'm very, very grateful.

23 comments:

Adriane said...

Awesome news!!! Congratulations. I think it's perfectly normal to feel cautiously happy. Can't wait to hear the beta numbers!!!

Elaine said...

Congratulations! Wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months!

Deborah said...

Congratulations! I think it's normal (at least for infertile folks) to feel more disbelief than excitement at the beginning. I imagine you'll feel better once you're further along than you were last time. Good luck. I'll keep checking back.

Tina said...

Congrats!

Searching said...

WONDERFUL!!! Those munchkins in there have my prayers to stick around a good long while. Enjoy the day and your wonderful secret!

Katie said...

Congratulations!

I know how scary these next few days and weeks will be.

I will be praying for you.

Chris said...

Congratulations on another step in the right direction!

JJ said...

Such wonderful news, D! I am SO happy for you! Pass on some of that IVF #2 luck to me, pretty please ;)

andrea_jennine said...

Congrats! I think your reservations are totally understandable. Don't try to make yourself feel a certain way, but don't borrow tomorrow's trouble, either. Praying for ongoing, obvious goodness.

Anonymous said...

Congradulations!!!!! Praying those sweet embies stick...praying peace for the both of you till you get your beta!!!!!

Rachel said...

Yay!

I know that the next few weeks will be scary for the two of you, but I hope you find a little time to celebrate the good news.

And I'm sure those little embies will stick around for a long time.

Julie and Greg said...

congrats! can't wait to hear the beta #!!

Morrisa said...

This is my first time visiting your blog and I just wanted to say congrats!

Spicy Sister said...

Congratulations!!!! I am excited to hear beta numbers! Best wishes for a happy and healthy nine months ahead.

Glenna Marshall said...

AAHHH!!! YAY!!! I'm so excited for you!!! I will be praying that this one sticks for a long 9 months! Congratulations!!

Alex & Jill said...

That's awesome news! I'll be praying that your beta is great and that those babies stick it out for a long 9 months. :) Congrats, girl!

Kim said...

Wishing and hoping for you!

The Baker's said...

Congrats, I pray that it sticks it out in there for the next 9 months.

Maria said...

I'll give you a reserved Congratulations!!!

Hope2morrow said...

Awesome! For those of us that have been pregnant and then had it taken away, positive results are nerve-racking. Tell fear to step aside so hope can take its place.

Best of luck with your beta results.

Stace said...

Congratulations!! I'm hoping for it to be very sticky for the next 8 months! :) Good luck and I'll be coming back for the numbers!

Dr. Grumbles said...

I have the highest hopes for a great outcome this time!

Sunny said...

Woot woot!